Thursday, April 12, 2012

Progress for Progess' sake?

Not so much.

I had been debating about whether or not to take summer classes. The plan was to take two this summer, then 4 in the fall, complete my degree and then take a break from school for a bit. There were definitely advantages to this plan, apart from being done asap. For example, should we be moving next spring/early summer, this would free me up completely to house hunt, pack and move.

I thought the decision would come down to financial aid. So I filled out my fafsa early, applied for summer aid and then started looking at what classes were available that met my requirements. I picked out my classes, debating between taking on one or two and waited to hear back from financial aid. In the meantime, I researched different professors and went back and forth over what I actually wanted.

Then I got word that my application was accepted and processed. I would hear the decision and any applicable amounts toward the middle/end of June. What?! Yeah. When my classes were more than half over, I would find out if I would be receiving any aid. So then I went back and forth over the gamble. How could I not get aid? It wasn't really that risky. But then I hadn't taken summer classes before, maybe it was different then... Well, maybe just the one class then. But then what was the point? I'd have to take 5 in the fall (never doing that again!) or one in the spring. So then two. But what about the aid? Back and forth I went.

Then today, I finally decided based on gut and, I believe, some God-instilled peace coming from a sense of right. That's one of my favorite feelings. That radiating warmth coming from the sense that something, or everything, is just simply right. I decided to not take summer classes this year, thereby pushing my graduation off til next spring.

It does kind of bum me out that I will be deliberately crossing that off the NYR and I didn't give it my all. But I think some wisdom comes from recognizing that not every goal should be completed on the time frame you set for yourself, and some not at all. This summer looks like it's going to be pretty amazing. I don't want to tarnish that by heaping too much on my plate, as I've been known to do, and stressing myself and Jon out. I've asked the girls to sacrifice a lot over the years as Jon and I got it together. Before Ella starts Kindergarten, I owe her a summer with all of my attention (with Lily, too). Jon will no longer be working over nights and will be working a 9-5 job (more about that in a post coming soon). I can only hope that will carry over on to the fall for his final semester, but in the chance that it doesn't, I'm not willing to squander my time with him to study (week countdown is at 37 for those of you wondering).

Those are my two main reasons, but there are plenty of other little ones supporting it. Truthfully, now that the decision has been made, I'm no longer thinking about the drawbacks or benefits of the choice. My focus is forward. And I'm looking forward to a blissful, relaxing, fun summer with family, camping, vacations, bbqs, and bonfires. It's going to be amazing and I'm going to be 100% present, for a change. :]

**on a totally unrelated side note, I'm quickly becoming obsessed with this song and thought I would share: Eyes Open (Taylor Swift)

1 comment:

  1. It will be nice to have you less burdened!