I've had it on my heart the last couple of weeks to write. The topics keep mounting so in true procrastinator fashion, I will talk about the most recent, the one I'm most excited about, paying no attention to those who have already been neglected for quite a while. I'll get to 'em (probably).
Last night I went to my first meeting for a new Beth Moore bible study. OHMAN! No one gets me excited to study God's word like she does. Although I'll be honest, I don't give many speakers the opportunity. I stick with what I like, and she and I clicked right away. I'm the kind of person who tries the famed sandwich on the menu and then orders the same thing for the next 17 straight visits.
Anyway, a friend of the family invited me to go. I've done several of her studies before (loved 'em all, in varying levels), but I haven't done one in about a year and a half. I had schedule conflicts and joined another bible study with friends. It was a dull ache you kind of get used to and ignore. I have enough on my plate right now that I wasn't actively looking to add anything else. But when Linda invited me, I couldn't resist. I'd missed her; she's always got a good attitude and a kind or positive thing to say and she's just good for the soul. And I'd missed Beth. And I missed a daily, deeper relationship with God. Right now, I'm mostly focusing on me, not on Him. And I feel more centered, more focused, more productive, more peaceful when my sight is on Him, rather than myself. But I really lack the self-discipline and motivation to sludge through it without a guide.
So, I agreed to go. And I had an awesome first night. We take turns putting out a dinner, buffet style, which as Jon pointed out makes sense since the bible study is right around dinner time. This makes me excited on a whole other level, haha. :]
But with or without the goodies, Beth is packing a serious punch with this study. I can't wait to dig in deeper. Our discussion group was on a shorter schedule since it was the first night, so we didn't have the weekly homework to discuss. But we did briefly share anything that we were especially struck by. Personally, I loved how Beth emphasized that we are holding onto our chains, our bondage, it's not binding us. Christ has already paid the price for us. We have already been set free, and we are clinging to our chains, unwilling to cast them aside. How true! Even when He has helped my pry my fingers loose, I have trouble walking away without looking back, without reaching back for the things that weighed me down. Insecurities, fears, obsessions. I remember them all and they creep back sometimes. And before you know it, I'm picking those chains up again and wrapping myself in them. But oh, how it helps to be reminded that they cannot bind us anymore- it's us that holds onto them. All we have to to do is let go. Hold onto Him instead.